FAITHFUL, OK — June 25, 2025
A local churchgoer is reeling today after realizing that Sunday’s entire sermon was, in fact, one very long, passive-aggressive subtweet aimed directly at him.
“I was sitting in the second row,” said Greg Fuller, 37, “minding my own business, when Pastor Rick suddenly started quoting word for word the exact argument I had with my wife in the car on the way to church. I mean, down to the sigh.”
The sermon, titled “The Subtle Sin of Self-Righteousness (Yes, You),” began innocently enough. But as Pastor Rick layered illustrations involving people who “can’t take correction,” “always need to have the last word,” and “refuse to let the Holy Spirit drive because they’re too busy grabbing the wheel and honking,” Fuller’s suspicions grew.
“I thought maybe the Holy Spirit was convicting me,” Greg admitted. “But then Pastor Rick said, ‘Some of you were yelling at your spouse in the Camry this morning and still think you're here to worship.’ That’s when I knew. He saw me. He knows about the Camry.”
When asked for comment, Pastor Rick denied targeting any one person.
“The Holy Spirit gave me that message,” he said. “But yeah, it was really specific.”
Greg has since vowed to either sit farther back next week or switch to the early service where “the sermons are shorter and less emotionally violent.”
At press time, Pastor Rick was seen preparing next Sunday’s message:
“How to Forgive Passive-Aggressive People Who Assume Everything Is About Them.”
